Left for Parody, No Mercy
by Gemini Gamer
Summary: Killing all zombies...as they spawn over and over.


Oblivion-Hey everybody another parody that I decided to make for no reason even though I still got five other stories to finish...but, this one I will finish quick. At least I hope it goes that way. If the title is not obvious to you this is a parody of the No Mercy campaign. But before I start that lets start with the intro movie.

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Prologue- Intro scene

TWO WEEKS SINCE FIRST INFECTION...

The survivors were in a dark ally. Well okay the lights were still on so the ally was kinda bright. In-fact it might have been too bright. But not the point. Mister old guy-I mean crazy grandpa-I mean Bill, yes Bill, signals the other survivors to stop. He then proceeds to touch green sticky stuff o his fingers

"Haven't seen crap like this." Says old gu-I mean Bill.

"Yes, that sooo gives you the idea to put your hand in the crap." Says Francis. Old guy gets up. And rubs the crap on Francis' vest.

"Their changing." He says

"Damn it Bill!" Francis sniffs the stuff on his vest. "Smells like apple pie."

"Homemade or McDonalds?" Zoey asks.

"Homemade." Francis responds. All of a sudden they hear a girl crying.

"Someone is still alive!" Zoey exclaims. "Or maybe I'm just to stupid to realize that it is not someone yet a crazy bitch who might kill me...naaahh that can't be it."

Bill and Zoey enter the dark room and Zoey turns her light on. "Hello?" She asks. "We're not going to kill you, we are just going to shoot you till you stop moving...And breathing..." She points her flash light around the room until they see it. It has no title yet it is just it. A woman in her bra and panties.

"Light," Bill shoves Zoey's light down. "off!" Bill then looks intensely at the woman's chest. Pervert..."Okay, on the count of 20, we run like hell. 1, 2..."

Outside Louis and Francis are standing guard. They hear footsteps and voices.

"I smell pie. Do you smell pie?" One voice asks.

"Hell yeah I smell pie!" the other voice responds.

"Let's get some pie!" Then they both see tons of infected heading their way. "GIVE US PIE!"

"Shit!" Louis exclaims. "Shiiitt! Shit!"

"15, 16, 17..." Bill continues his counting. Louis runs in the room.

"Their coming!" Louis not only yells, but points his flash light at the woman

_Louis startled the Witch. Man Louis are you screwed._

"20! Run like hell!" Zoey yells. They run out of the room and Louis shuts the door and slams up against it. But the witch gets her hand out through the door. Louis then starts shooting her arm like it will kill her.

"White bitch committing hate crime!" Louis yells.

"Stick together!" Francis exclaims. Louis somehow managed to kill the witch all by himself.

"Witch hunter, hell yeah!" Louis joins the group in the killing of the zombies. Then Bill get pulled from behind.

"Ahhh, it's so wet!" Bill yells.

_Smoker incapacitated Bill. Really Bill? A Smoker?_

"That's what she said!" Yelled Francis as he turned around and head shot the smoker. Francis then helps Bill up.

"Smokers must be really great french kissers." Bill said as he got up. Francis shoots one infected in the head.

"Happy Holidays." Francis says.

They continue to fight the horde when Zoey takes out her pipe bomb she throws it. The last six infected go after the bomb thinking 'shiny beeping thing, there is obviously no tricks behind it.' they start to fight over the bomb until it explodes. Louis stumbles and then sees a helicopter flying and runs after it. "Heeeeeey! We're not infected! Down Here!" The helicopter just keeps on trucking. "Oh gosh darn it!" What Louis wasn't expecting was the hunter form behind.

_Hunter performs 25 damage pounce. That bot is totally boss!_

_Hunter incapacitated Louis. See Louis? This is why you don't go ahead of the group._

Zoey runs over and rams the hunter off Louis and starts shooting the hunter. Louis starts shooting the hunter with his hand gun.

_Zoey killed Hunter. Way to go Zoey!_

_Louis alerted the horde...Louis, you're a little screw up today aren't you?_

"Well now this is just some bull crap!" Bill exclaims. They go to the open street and stand there while thousands f infected crowed around the street and for some reason not attacking. Francis has his back turned to the rest of the survivors and hears a angered growl and sees a car flying through the sky

'hmmm...' He thought. 'should I tell my teammates that there is a car about to hit us?' The car falls to the ground and into the fence 'they probably figured it out by know.'

The Tank comes at full speed, killing any infected in his way. He is clearly not a rip off of The Incredible Hulk.

"Pancakes, or waffles?" Louis asks. The Tank approaches fast. "Pancakes or waffles?"

"French Toast!" Bill replies. They all head their way down and ally while Zoey runs and the rest run backwards shooting.

"Screw you guys I'm running like hell!" Zoey screamed. They turn the corner to a fire escape even though there is no fire.

"Get to the ruff!" Louis yells.

"What the fudge muffins is the ruff?" Asks Zoey.

"I think he means the roof..." States Francis.

"Talk about Louis' play on words later!" Bill starts shooting more zombies while Zoey climbs the fire escape. Francis sits with his shotgun for the Tank. The Tank Comes around the corner and smacks Francis to the ground.

"Oh, butter biscuits!" He yells in anger.

"Butter biscuits?" This attracts Bill's attention. Right before the Tank smashed Francis to the ground, Bill shoots the Tank. "Gimme the butter biscuits!" Bill yells at the Tank. The Tank gets pissed and throws a rock at Louis and nearly hits him and Francis. "Alright, fine! We can share it. But I want the bigger half." Zoey then shoots an Infected trying to attack Bill.

"There is no butter biscuits! Get up here!" Zoey says while Bill climbs the ladder. The Tank tries to climb but breaks the fire escape. Bill is saved by Louis. Zoey nearly falls to her death, drops her pistol and jumps off reaching for Francis hand.

"FRANCIS!" She cries out and Francis grabs her hand and pulls up and Louis and Francis touch her ass while she gets up.

"We made..." Louis says. "And It was on Expert!"

"Son we just did one campaign." Bill lights his cigarette. "Lets not throw a part until we are done with the game." All four walk over to the table.

"We didn't get nothing special?"

"I blame Louis!"

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Oblivion-well..I got nothing to say...uuuuummmmm...I blame Louis!


End file.
